Top 10 Ways You Know You Just Heard a Wade Hodges Sermon

On Sunday, we had a farewell luncheon at Garnett. The food was great. It was roasted pork loin. The entertainment was even better. It was roasted Wade. The Garnett leadership team really knows my love language. To me, nothing says “I love you” like good-natured kidding. Why hug someone when you can insult them? That’s what I always say. Anyway, they did a great job.

Loy Johnson did a top 10 list. Only one thing he said sorta bothered me, but I’ll keep that secret for now.

The Top Ten Ways You Know You Just Heard a Wade Hodges Sermon

1. At lunch, the topic of conversation centers around the question ?Did he really just say what I think he said??

2. You?re not quite sure yet, but you have either just been highly offended, or deeply challenged.

3. You leave the service wrestling with unanswered questions ? most glaringly, ?Where did he get those Chuck Taylor tennis shoes ? and why??

4. People are seen fleeing the auditorium with ears covered, screaming ?It can?t be, it can?t be?.

5. When confronting your teenage son about leaving his dirty clothes on the bathroom floor, he argues that according to Wade?s ?both ?and? theology, your job as a mother is to both pick up his clothes, and to wash them. He is immediately grounded for life.

6. You contact the bulimia hot line to set up an intervention.

7. Your grandmother comments, ?That sermon on sin was really great ? do you think he was for it or against it??

8. You have had your toes stepped on, your brain stretched, your sensibilities shaken, your presuppositions shattered, your doctrinal positions contested, your traditional thinking challenged, and all that you hold dear called into question. But other than that, it was a good morning.

9. You realize there might actually be democrats in heaven ? they just have to sit with the Presbyterians.

10. You have a sudden and unyielding urge to do homework.