I’ve received more feedback to the following section of Before You Go than any other. I’ve heard from multiple ministers who have written to say, “That is exactly what happened to me!”
What do you think about this principle?
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If I could dispense one piece of quirky advice to someone about to move to a new church it would be this:
Pay attention to the person who picks you up at the airport.
Because there is a good chance that the person who picks you up at the airport will be the first person to oppose, betray, or be openly critical of you.
He may be picking you up because he’s the leader of the search team and feels that you are beholden to him since he’s the one most responsible for hiring you.[1] When you refuse to be recruited to his side of a controversial issue several months later, he’ll remind you that you wouldn’t have a job if it weren’t for him.
She may be there because she’s hoping your wife will become her new best friend. She figures that if she is best friends with the preacher’s wife, she’ll have the inside track on what is really going on in the church. When she and your wife fail to connect, she’ll start a whispering campaign against you.
The sweet elderly couple may be there picking you up because they live closest to the airport and have no ulterior motives whatsoever. But you have no way of knowing that and being cautious is better than being blindsided.
This “airport principle” is really just another way of saying that those who are first to befriend you during the interview or when you first arrive at your new church may be doing so for a number of reasons; some more nefarious than others.
It can be especially devastating to rookie ministers when their first “friend” at their first church brings the honeymoon to a screeching halt.
Telling Stories, Asking Questions, Learning Lessons
Ha!
Although I chuckled a bit, this post made me very sad and a bit ashamed. This actually happens??
I wouldn’t know as neither my husband or I have interviewed for ministry positions. The last time my Jeff interviewed for a job, they flew us both out, sent a driver to pick us up, put us up in an awesome hotel, and sent me to the day spa while he was interviewing. I told him that if they offered him a job, he better take it because I could tell it was a company that cared about families. They did offer, he accepted, and I was right- they’ve taken pretty good care of us!
It is my opinion that people in ministry, whether they end up being hired or not, should be treated as royalty. If I’m ever on a search committee, I will not forget this post.
Erin–thanks for such a great comment. I hope you are on a search committee some day!
That is so true! The people that came and helped me move were the first ones to stab me in the back.